Curtain Raiser

Why We Can’t Dine With the President, Colltalers

A funny thing happened since the Supreme Court’s confirmed the legality of the so-called Obamacare law: our inbox got flooded with requests for donations and invitations to ‘join the president’ for dinner.
We don’t want to be rude. After all, it’s an invitation to meet the man and, you know, being pampered all the way to some fancy party, where we’re bound to meet a celebrity or two, sipping Chianti right next to us.
However, we must decline your so kind invitation, Mr. President, at least for now. You see, we’re fine about you choosing us over so many, to ask to donate $3 to your campaign, and have a chance to meet Michelle.
We don’t even have a problem having to clean up our email services and, well, forward the hundreds of messages your party’s been sending us lately to the spam box.
It could be the money, yes, for even though it’s ‘just’ $3, it’s a $3 that sometimes we, and millions of people across the country, don’t have to spare.
But it’s neither that nor the fact that small donations these days really mean almost nothing, in the land of Super PACs and super donors.
To begin with, we’d have a big problem with some guests in your list, Mr. President. We can’t believe that you’re still inviting some of the most notorious Wall Street high rollers, who just a few years ago, broke America and the world’s financial system.
The fact they’re still roaming free the corridors of power sickens us a great deal. We simply can’t swallow that none of them have gone to jail or even got poorer yet.
Neither we fathom that you’ve just authorized oil drilling in Alaska, knowing that it’ll only be a matter of time before a disaster, perhaps even worst than the one at the Gulf of Mexico a year ago, will happen.
You’ve also certainly read about the Arctic permafrost, which is already melting and freeing lethal gases trapped for centuries straight to the atmosphere.
So how come you’re playing along with another proposal to transport oil through miles of land, oil that won’t even be used to heat our homes or fuel our ecologically-wrong cars? As someone would say, we thank you kindly, but your policies are anything but.
What about Guantanamo Bay and its prisoners, when are they going to be charged in regular courts? How come you haven’t said a thing about the use of surveillance drones within the U.S.?
By the way, when are all the illegal tapping of U.S. citizens stop, since there can’t be possibly any law supporting the practice? When are you going to at least acknowledge that you promised us a different kind of government?
We’re very sorry, but we just can’t break bread with you and your illustrious friends, Mr. President, and we’re sure there are many of them around, thank goodness. It’s just not for us to enjoy the d’oeuvres if they’re also being served on the back of people whose support you’ve used to get elected and now are almost pariahs in your cabinet.
It’s just a dinner, some may argue, it’s no big, overarching, principled political statement we’re making here, mind you.
But we feel that we haven’t been doing much to express our disgust with some aspects of your administration, fearful our criticism may be cashed in by the candidate of corporate raiders and wealthy managers everywhere.
We haven’t gone to the dark side yet, but that doesn’t mean we have to pretend we don’t see what’s going on this side either. To be honest, we never thought we would be in a position to refuse such a distinguished invitation.
But for now, at least, we thank you very much but we’re turning your mail into spam, along with all those offers of low-rate credit cards, instant cash, and horny housewives living in the neighborhood. Have a great week, everybody.



One thought on “Curtain Raiser

  1. My household sent in $9, $3 for both humans and $3 from Zoey the Cool Cat……….lol


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