Rapture Attire Tips

Radical Fashion for
Your Last Day on Earth

Just in time for enjoying the balmy weather in the Northern Hemisphere, may we suggest your most proper attire?
For the ladies, we thought about something light, colorful, to go along with the joy of being rescued from this valley of tears straight to the triage line for the final rapture. Accessorize it with some long-hanging jewelery and voilá, you’re ready to face the end of the days in style.
For you guys, nothing says “I’m ready” better than the hoodie and sunglasses combo, sported by the Unabomber on his way to place a few bottles of Tylenol at the local pharmacy, or mail one of his explosive statements to some unsuspected scientist. Since you missed your chance to be done in by the man himself, what about wearing one of his scary jackets, all courtesy of the U.S. Marshals, who put up some of his personal items for an online auction?
Make all religious psychos of the world, and their hordes of zealots, conspiracy nuts and suicidal priests very impressed with your willingness to leave the earth for everybody else, who should be so lucky. Comes tomorrow morning, we wonder whether the massive wave of excuses for what hasn’t happened will verge on the creative, cynical, or just plain deranged. In the meantime, paraphrasing that old Argentinian icon, Che, “one may need to grow insane, but should never lose their sense of fashion.” Or something like that.

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