Petty Crimes

t seems like it was just yesterday. 2012, as a matter of fact, when all our concerns were about a bullying culture taking over the Internet. Hardly we knew that four years later, we’d elect a major offender to the White House too. Or should we have expected that to happen?
Not to engage in self-flagellation any more that’s already due, at least to some of us, here’s an old post to evoke a bygone era when it was still possible to believe we were going to get better, and trolls and conspiracy nuts would hit their expiration date soon enough.
For it’s actually a hopeful article, and brief too, let us add, lest not let any dragging feelings of defeat cloud our already sore horizon. But we did get to a dangerous point when it seems impossible to get any worse and, at the same time, perfectly natural if it really does.
For on the first anniversary of Trumpism, things look so bleak that many of us will do the only thing that still brings relief to the overall doom proceedings: we’ll be screaming out loud tonight, at the nearest public place and along a crowd of dissatisfied customers like us. We do hope someday you won’t need to join us but for now, all are invited.

When the Rude, the Offensive & the
Inconsiderate Get to Pay Their Dues

Now for something completely different. For many a poor old devil, there’s been a thousand times plus one, when happiness has stood farther apart than ever, just because some idiot was blocking the way. More often than not, help was not forthcoming, and the troll won.
That’s not what’s these stories are about. Have you been annoyed lately by talkers at the movies? people who curse right in front of your little niece? neighbors worshiping loudly on the front yard? Good news: people in England, Belgium and the U.S. have just had about enough.
Even if these effective techniques involve a measure of confrontation, or the ever so slow work of the legislator, none is violent or unreasonable. They’re all solidly based on the democratic tenet that my freedom to act like a douche ends when your own stupid stunt starts.
Obviously, we shouldn’t have to be getting to this to placate our torments. On the same token, no one needs to place anonymous rants in some comment stream to vent their frustration. Or worse, getting so self-righteous about it, as to justify blood and dismemberment.
In most cases, we shouldn’t be bothered. When Brazilian bestseller author Paulo Coelho said that ‘if you dissect ‘Ulysses,’ it gives you a tweet,’ he was expressing his opinion, even if most who read James Joyce’s masterpiece couldn’t disagree more. Ultimately, though, his own admission of ignorance may’ve set in motion the erosion of any credibility towards his own self-aggrandizing work.
In others, you may be annoyed, it may be inconvenient, but it’s not hurting you, and it’s bound not to last more than a brief moment in your long, fruitful life. That’s the case of a New Yorker, so thrilled by his own singing abilities, to the point of having an entire subway (more)
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* When Beast Attack
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Old Underwear

Abreast About Bras, Breast
Washers & Victoria’s Knickers

News about ancient female undergarments took our breath away. It’s well established that much of Medieval and Victorian attire had all the makings of portable restrainers, as women were deemed their fathers and husbands’ property. Just like some faiths would still have it.
A set of brassieres, found in a floorboard vault of the 1100s Lengberg Castle, and one of Queen Victoria’s own bottoms, show that such zeal went even deeper. While the bras look sexy, in a poverty-chic kind of way, the huge ‘bloomers’ would make even a clown blush.
Victoria’s secrets, which have been sold in auction, were known to exist, but the elaborate needle-lace design of the bras was a relative surprise. Their format, with distinct cut cups, is unlike that of the antique strips of cloth or leather favored by Greeks and Romans, used mainly to flatten the breasts.
Researchers who are studying the pieces are unsure whether the well preserved linen underpants also found in the vault are female or male. That’s because while men were known for wearing them, women are believed to have acquired the habit much later, around the time when England’s Virgin Queen was crowned, in the early 1800s.
Risking veering off the subject here, but in a loosely related field, it’s interesting how breast washers became relatively popular, just over a century later. Even though they seem inexplicable from the point of view of modern notions of hygiene, Continue reading

Petty Crimes

When the Rude, the Offensive & the
Inconsiderate Must Pay Their Dues

Now for something completely different. For many a poor old devil, there’s been a thousand times plus one, when happiness has stood farther apart than ever, just because some idiot was blocking the way. More often than not, help was not forthcoming, and the troll won.
That’s not what’s these stories are about. Have you been annoyed lately by talkers at the movies? people who curse right in front of your little niece? neighbors worshiping loudly on the front yard? Good news: people in England, Belgium and the U.S. have just had about enough.
Even if these effective techniques involve a certain level of confrontation, or the ever so slow work of the legislator, none is violent or unreasonable. They’re all solidly based on the democratic tenet that my freedom to act like a douche ends when your own stupid stunt starts.
Obviously, we shouldn’t have to be getting to this to placate our torments. On the same token, though, no one needs to place anonymous rants in some comment stream to vent their frustration. Or worse, getting so self-righteous about it, as to justify blood and dismemberment.
In most cases, we shouldn’t be bothered. When Brazilian bestseller author Paulo Coelho said that ‘if you dissect ‘Ulysses,’ it gives you a tweet,’ he was expressing his opinion, even if most who read James Joyce’s masterpiece couldn’t disagree more. Ultimately, though, his own admission of ignorance may’ve set in motion the erosion of any credibility towards his own self-aggrandizing work.
In others, you may be annoyed, it may be inconvenient, but it’s not hurting you, and it’s bound not to last more than a brief moment in your long, fruitful life. That’s the case of a New Yorker, so thrilled by his own singing abilities, to the point of having an entire subway Continue reading

Friendly Reminders


Regarding a Cat & a Goose
& the Health of Cockroaches

Consider yourself warned. Please use the other door. Dispose of your cigarette buts in the proper receptacles.
Keep your voice down. Step aside for the avian porter. We care about our floor guests. And do not sit next to the Waiting Room feline.

All are welcome. We do not discriminate on the basis of faith, nationality or species.

Enjoy the weekend.

Cat Fight

Suicides. Blackouts. Parasites.  
Are Felines the New Scapegoats?

There comes a time in the life of any blogger when it’s necessary to make a stand about an issue. Whether it’s because we’ve failed to convey the depth of our convictions. Or perhaps there’s some merit in any claim to the contrary. Or even, out of sheer paranoia, for we fear our five or six readers may be packing for lack of excitement.
Whatever the case may be, let’s put it bluntly, and let’s give it the whole emphasis we can possibly muster and say it out loud: you, out there, stop blaming cats for every ailment afflicting mankind nowadays, or else they may have no other choice but to withdraw support to our lifestyle. Which, if our calculations are correct, will pretty much end life on earth as we know it.
We felt that we had to express ourselves because such claims, that cats are responsible for suicides among Danish girls, or for the blackout that left 600 million Indians in the dark, just to name the latest, threaten the very fabric of our long sealed agreement with such generous and highly ethical species. We’re talking about felines, not humans, of course.
It’s enough that throughout the years we had to put up with false claims that they were in cahoots with demons and witches, bent into stealing the soul of our babies. Or that their supreme sacrifice of getting rid of rats wasn’t what really ended the Black Plague. Or that toxoplasmosis is on the rise and could as well be the next epidemic to wipe us out of this planet.
Really? How soon we forget. At each of these instances, when they Continue reading

Primate Time News

Taking Pics, Recognizing Words &  
Things Apes Can Do Better Than Us

Ugandapithecus, a 20-million year old skull found this week in 2011, was the latest and most complete bone remnants discovered of a primate that may have been our relative. It’s also our excuse to report what’s up with our still living relatives, monkeys, baboons, macaques, and orangutans.
Since we’re passed acknowledging their smarts, which hasn’t prevented us from treating them like our servers, we’ll simply line up a few startling examples, and let you dwell on your own conclusions. After all, we still haven’t found a way of picturing animals without placing ourselves in front of the camera.
Much of our research about primates, for instance, is not about them, but entirely focused on how much they can help us understand ourselves. We tend to attribute a disproportional weight on that single-digit percentage that set us apart from apes, and skim over everything else we may share with them.
At the same time, we make the serious mistake of seeing us in them, to the point of anthropomorphizing everything they do. That’s led to Continue reading

The Weekly Weird

A Panties-Loving Goblin, the Hit
Man Cometh & a Breastfeed Bandit

Reality has become way more inventive than the pampered Hollywood semi-gods may dream of in their golden bathtubes. Or something like that. A trio of far out stories we’ve found, for instance, could turn into such wondrous movie experiences, that we bet no idea currently being considered for the screen would come any close.
The thing is, though, for the man who came forward about some vanishing panties in Zimbabwe, or the woman obsessed in feeding somebody else’s baby, or the unknown hoaxer pretending to have a contract on the reader, this is what life feels like. Since no one can make this stuff up, we’re glad to brief you on them.
As it’s customary on this site, we’re not about to showcase anyone’s dirty laundry here, or paint what these unfortunate souls go through every day with heavy tones. Why bother? The absurd of their clash with reality is enough to provide plenty of color and misery, without us adding any more salt to the wounds.
Still we’re always in awe and enraptured by what we naively assume should be an uniform perception of the universe that surrounds us. As it turns out, some universes are way more intense than others, and for those who’re capable of soaking themselves in the flip side of the common experience, well, more power to them, we must say.
After all, such uniform perception is, in itself, an illusion, a self-deception we’re used to invoke every time reality seems to sway in Continue reading